the locked commitment

The office buzzed with the usual midday activity as Mia sat at her desk, typing away while the sun streamed through the large windows, casting a warm glow over the room. Across the space, Jake paced, glancing anxiously at his watch and then back at Mia.

He approached her desk, tension etched on his face. “Mia, can we talk?”

She looked up, sensing the urgency in his tone. “Of course. What’s going on?”

Jake leaned in, lowering his voice. “I know it’s Locktober and all, but… I really can’t take this anymore. Can you please just take the device off for one night?”

Mia crossed her arms, a hint of amusement in her eyes. “Jake, you promised to keep it on for the whole month. Remember? This was your idea.”

His shoulders sagged, frustration bubbling just below the surface. “I know, but it’s been three weeks. I thought I could handle it, but it’s so much harder than I imagined. I’m distracted all the time, and I miss you.”

Mia studied him, her expression softening but resolute. “I understand. But this isn’t just about the physical aspect. It’s about commitment and trust.”

Jake sighed deeply, running a hand through his hair. “I can’t concentrate on work. Every time I sit at my desk, I feel the weight of it. My mind keeps drifting, and it’s embarrassing.”

“Think of it as a challenge,” she said, her voice steady. “Every time you feel that urge, remind yourself why you chose this. It’s about control and connection.”

He nodded, though the struggle was palpable in his eyes. “It’s hard to focus when all I can think about is being locked up. It feels like I’m constantly on edge.”

“Remember, Jake,” Mia continued, leaning forward. “This is about more than just physical release. It’s about growing together, learning patience. It’s supposed to be hard.”

He looked down, his heart racing as frustration mixed with longing. “But right now, it feels unbearable. I thought I could find ways to cope, but it’s like my brain is wired to fixate on it.”

Mia smiled gently, but her resolve remained firm. “That’s part of the journey. And part of what makes it meaningful. I won’t give in, not this time. It wouldn’t be fair to either of us.”

Jake took a step back, frustration boiling over. “You don’t understand! I can’t focus on the reports or the meetings. I just feel… trapped. It’s distracting, and it’s getting worse.”

“Then let’s make a deal,” Mia suggested, her eyes gleaming with determination. “Every time you feel tempted to ask me to take it off, redirect that energy into completing a work task instead. I’ll help you stay focused.”

He let out a small, frustrated laugh, despite the seriousness of the situation. “So you’re turning my frustration into a productivity challenge?”

“Exactly! And at the end of the month, if you manage to keep that promise, I’ll reward you in a way that will make this all worth it,” she replied, her tone both playful and sincere.

Jake felt a flicker of hope, though the struggle remained evident on his face. “Okay, I’ll try. But I can’t promise I won’t be tempted. It’s really hard.”

Mia reached out, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze. “I believe in you. This challenge is tough, but it’s also a chance for us to grow closer. Embrace the struggle.”

He nodded, though doubt lingered in the back of his mind. As he returned to his desk, Jake felt the weight of the device pressing down on him, a constant reminder of his commitment. With each passing moment, the urge to reach out to Mia grew stronger, pulling at his resolve.

The hours dragged on, and he found himself staring blankly at his computer screen, thoughts racing. Each ping of an email or buzz of his phone pulled him back into the reality of work, but the device felt like a heavy anchor, dragging him under.

He glanced at Mia, who was immersed in her own tasks, and his heart ached with longing. How was it possible to feel so connected yet so far away? The struggle consumed him, and he knew he had to channel it into something productive.

With a deep breath, Jake turned back to his work, focusing on the reports piled high on his desk. Each word felt like a battle, but he pushed through, reminding himself of the commitment he made. He threw himself into tasks, losing track of time, but the moment he paused, the weight of his desires crashed back down on him.

Hours later, as the workday neared its end, Jake found himself standing by the window, looking out at the bustling city below. The sun was beginning to set, painting the sky in hues of orange and purple, but inside, he felt a tempest brewing.

Mia approached him, sensing the turmoil within him. “You’re doing great, Jake. Just a little longer. You’ve made it this far.”

He turned to her, desperation lacing his voice. “But I can’t keep pretending this is easy. It feels impossible.”

“Jake, remember the promise you made. It’s not just about this month; it’s about what we’re building together. The struggle is part of that. It’s what makes the eventual reward so much sweeter.”

Her words hit him like a wave, washing over him and grounding him. He nodded, though the fight within him continued. “I just… I really miss being close to you.”

“I’m right here,” she said softly, stepping closer. “And when you finally earn that release, it will mean so much more because of everything you’ve endured. Trust the process.”

As he took a deep breath, Jake felt the tension ease just a little. With Mia’s unwavering support, he began to see the challenge in a different light. This wasn’t just about the device—it was about embracing the journey and the deepening bond they were forming through it.

With renewed determination, Jake returned to his desk, focusing on the tasks ahead. The struggle was real, but so was the promise they had made to each other. And as the day drew to a close, he found a flicker of hope in the knowledge that he could face whatever challenges lay ahead, side by side with Mia.

Embracing Locktober

 As October rolls around, I get excited for Locktober—a month full of fun and exploration in the world of chastity. For those who might not know, Locktober is when many men wear chastity devices, diving into the exciting dynamics of restraint and control.

Why Locktober Matters to Me

Locktober isn’t just a challenge; it’s a chance for both partners to grow closer and explore new aspects of their relationship. When my partner participates in this journey, it brings a whole new level of intimacy and trust. Here’s why I love it:

The Benefits of Chastity

• Heightened Sensitivity: When my man is locked away, the anticipation builds. This makes every touch feel more intense, turning ordinary moments into something special.

• Increased Desire: The thrill of restraint creates a powerful desire. As the days go by, that anticipation makes our time together even more exciting and passionate.

• Stronger Emotional Connection: Engaging in chastity encourages open conversations about our desires and boundaries. This deeper communication builds a stronger emotional bond between us.

• Empowerment for Me: Knowing that my partner trusts me enough to explore this dynamic makes me feel empowered. It shows that he values my leadership and guidance in our relationship.

• Creative Exploration: Locktober gives us a chance to be playful and creative. We can set challenges, try new things, and explore fantasies together, which keeps the excitement alive.

Tips for a Meaningful Locktober

Here are some simple tips to make your Locktober experience even better:

1. Set Clear Boundaries: Talk openly about your limits and what you both want. Setting safe words ensures everyone feels comfortable.

2. Incorporate Daily Challenges: I love creating fun challenges each day—like teasing texts or playful tasks. These keep the energy up and make the journey enjoyable.

3. Communicate Regularly: Check in with each other often. Discuss what feels good and any changes you might want to make to keep things exciting.

4. Explore Together: Use this month to try out new dynamics. Experiment with different teasing techniques, role-play, or introduce new toys to discover what you both enjoy.

Locktober is a fantastic opportunity for both partners to explore and connect. If you’re thinking about joining in this month, I encourage you to embrace the excitement, enjoy the journey, and remember that trust and communication are key. Here’s to a fun and empowering Locktober!

accountability sessions

 I’m super excited to share some news with you all. Starting today, I’m offering private accountability sessions via email or over the phone. If you’re a guy looking for some serious guidance, discipline, and a firm but fair hand to keep you on track, this is for you.

These sessions are going to be a deep and humbling experience. We’ll go beyond just setting rules – we’ll dig into what’s really behind your habits and struggles. I’ll be there to listen, understand, and give you the push you need to make real changes.

I’ll set clear goals for you and check in regularly to make sure you’re staying on course. But be warned, this isn’t going to be a walk in the park. Expect real consequences for falling short. There will be punishments like corner time, orgasm denial, writing lines, scoldings, and even being sent to bed early. It’s tough love, but it works.

Whether it’s beating procrastination, improving your personal habits, or just needing someone to keep you focused, I’ve got you covered. It’s going to be tough but rewarding, and you’ll feel a real difference.

This isn’t for everyone – it’s for those ready to face their challenges head-on and commit to serious self-improvement. If you’re up for the journey, reach out to me via email   diestarkefrau@yahoo.com   to set up a session. 

Tell me a bit about yourself and what you want to achieve. I’m very selective about who I work with because I want to ensure everyone is genuinely committed.

power exchange isn't easy

I recently started offering interactive experiences like corner time and online writing line sessions to connect more deeply with you and to explore the dynamics we all crave. The responses I received were both surprising and enlightening, revealing a lot about what you really want.

The most striking thing I noticed was the dual nature of your desires. On one hand, you wanted me to be strict and take control, bossing you around and creating a strong power exchange. This was to be expected in a scenario where the thrill comes from giving up control.

On the other hand, some of you wanted to dictate how the sessions went, essentially "topping from the bottom." You told me exactly what you wanted and how the session should unfold. This showed a need for control and personalization, even in a dynamic where one party usually takes the lead.

Balancing these desires was an interesting challenge. It meant understanding your boundaries and preferences while being flexible with the session dynamics.

Did I always succeed? Nope.

I struggle with the aspect of maintaining authority while being flexible. For me, it is important to keep my authority while accommodating your input.  It is not easy to preserve the power exchange while respecting your need for agency.

Add to it the element of money and things get even more complicated. Some of you were worried that I would just be interested in getting your money. An accusation that actually hurt my feelings a lot.

Others were trying to make sure I don't scam them. I understand that, taking into consideration the many scams that are to be found online. But then, I am thinking: "come on, man. There are so much easier ways out there to scam someone than writing a blog for over a decade about my own journey, my deepest desires, needs, hopes and cravings."

I made a promise to myself in the past to not give myself away for free ever again. I have done that so many times in the past, I won't do that anymore. That's why I insist on a fee when you want to interact with me personally.

Basically: it's all much more complicated than I was hoping.

If you're still interested in joining a session or have any thoughts to share, feel free to reach out. 

corner time sessions

 Just FYI: I now also offer corner time sessions, meticulously designed to correct misbehavior, enhance self-discipline, and provide an unmatched level of accountability.

Imagine standing in the corner of your own room, feeling my watchful eyes on you through the screen, guiding you towards better behavior and personal growth.

In our sessions, you will be instructed to position yourself in the corner, hands at your sides or on your head, as I observe and ensure you maintain the proper stance. 

My stern voice will remind you of the reasons you're there, reinforcing the lessons you need to learn. You will experience the powerful blend of humiliation and introspection, knowing that I am in control, and you are under my strict supervision.

I understand that it takes immense courage to submit to me and relinquish control. Each session is tailored to your specific needs and transgressions. Whether you're being punished for a recent misdeed or working to overcome bad habits, my firm but fair approach will keep you focused and motivated. I offer a safe and confidential space where you can submit to my authority and embrace the discipline you crave.

Are you ready to stand in the corner, feel the weight of my presence, and emerge as a better version of yourself?

Disobedience will not be tolerated. You have been warned.

:-)

Online Writing Line Session For You

 

Are you ready to embark on a journey of discipline and self-improvement unlike any other? I'm thrilled to extend to you a special invitation to participate in an extraordinary experience: an Online Writing Lines Session.

In this exclusive 2-hour session, you will have the unparalleled opportunity to engage with me, a skilled disciplinarian, who will expertly guide you through the art of writing lines. But let me assure you, this is far more than a mere exercise in penmanship. It's an exploration of power dynamics, submission, and the eroticism inherent in discipline, all from the comfort and privacy of your own space.

Now, you may be wondering what exactly this entails. Picture this: you, seated before your computer screen, pen in hand, as I command your attention with my authoritative presence. With each stroke of your pen, you'll be not only refining your handwriting but also delving deep into the psyche of submission, obedience, and focus.

But fear not, my friends, for this session is not about intimidation or coercion. It's about creating a safe and nurturing environment where you can freely explore your desires and boundaries. Whether you're a seasoned practitioner well-versed in the rituals of kink or someone curious to dip their toes into this captivating world, this session welcomes all with open arms.

But let's not ignore the elephant in the room: the tantalizingly humiliating aspect of this experience. In the controlled environment of our session, you'll find that the feelings of humiliation and submission, often elusive in real life, come easily and naturally. As you obediently write line after line under my watchful eyes, you'll feel a delicious blend of shame and arousal wash over you, heightening your senses and intensifying your experience.

You'll discover the satisfaction that comes from surrendering to discipline.  And yes, for the tantalizingly affordable investment of $50, you can secure your place in this transformative experience.

So, if you're eager to explore the depths of your desires and embrace the thrill of submission, seize this opportunity today. Spaces are limited, and demand is high, so don't miss your chance to embark on an unforgettable journey of self-discovery and erotic exploration.

Just drop me a line at 

diestarkefrau (at) yahoo.com

Looking forward to hearing from you.

Tina

mouth soaping

In the hushed aftermath of a friend's wedding, Eric and Tina found themselves navigating a night that would forever linger in their memories. 

The air was thick with jubilation and the echoes of laughter, yet it was overshadowed by the discord that had unfolded between them. Tina, steadfast and sober, held the role of designated driver with grace, her eyes focused on the road ahead as Eric's voice slurred and stumbled through the night air. 

The once jovial atmosphere had taken a somber turn as Eric's words cut through the mirth, the sting of his accusation settling like a stone in the pit of Tina's stomach.  "You are a fucking bitch, Tina. Stay away from me, you bitch. You always want to be in control, I don’t want to have anything to do with you" Eric kept saying over and over.  He was drunk, very drunk, and Tina was scared, very scared. Scared of him. 

As they journeyed homeward, Tina's heart ached, her emotions a whirlwind of hurt and helplessness. Eric's actions had betrayed a side of him she had rarely seen—an aggression fueled by alcohol, directed at her, his beloved partner. 

The weight of his words was a heavy burden, one that pressed upon Tina's shoulders as she maneuvered through the streets. The drive home was fraught with tension, the car a cocoon of silence punctuated by Eric's slurred insults. Each syllable chipped away at Tina's heart, her grip on the steering wheel tightening as she struggled to keep her composure. She yearned for the laughter and camaraderie that had filled their evening, now tainted by Eric's mean and hurtful words.

 As they finally pulled into their driveway, Tina's heart was heavy with a mixture of relief and sorrow. With a heavy sigh, she turned to Eric, her eyes searching his for a glimpse of the man she knew was still there beneath the alcohol-induced haze. "We're home, Eric," her voice was gentle, her words an attempt to calm him down and not infuriate him even more. Quietly they went to bed in separate rooms that night.

The weight of his actions settled heavily upon him as he sobered up the next morning, his heart heavy with regret. Tina's eyes held a mixture of disappointment and hurt as she looked at Eric. Her voice, laced with a raw edge, resonated through the room, laying bare the impact of his words. "Eric, what you said last night was hurtful and unacceptable." His heart sank as he listened to Tina's words. The reality of his actions hit him like a tidal wave, the gravity of his mistake gnawing at his conscience. He felt a mixture of shame and remorse. Tina's emotions were palpable, her frustration simmering beneath the surface. Her voice trembled with a mix of anger and sadness as she continued, "What the fuck were you doing? I thought we had built a foundation of respect and trust. Calling me those words goes against everything we stand for. Do you really think I am a bitch? Is this really how you feel about me?"

Eric's gaze remained fixed on the ground. His words caught in his throat. He knew he had crossed a line, a line that marked a breach of the bond they had nurtured over time. The thought of disappointing Tina, of tarnishing their connection, weighed heavily on his heart. The weight of his actions bore down on him, a relentless reminder of the hurt he had caused. 

Eric's heart clenched as he met Tina's gaze, her eyes a reflection of the pain his words had inflicted. The realization of the depth of his mistake gnawed at his conscience, and he felt a pang of remorse that settled heavily in his chest. Tina's voice wavered with a mix of anger and sadness; her emotions laid bare. "I was so scared of you, last night. You showed a totally different character. I felt like I didn’t even know you."

His throat tightened, words failing him as he absorbed the magnitude of his failure. He wanted to take back those words, to erase the pain he had caused, but he knew that wasn't possible.  As Tina's eyes held his, her voice grew firmer, her emotions brimming to the surface. "I won't stand for this kind of behavior, Eric. There needs to be consequences for your words."

Eric's heart raced, anxiety coursing through his veins. He knew he deserved consequences for his thoughtless actions, but the uncertainty of what Tina had in mind left him both apprehensive and curious. 

Tina's next words struck him with a mixture of surprise and apprehension. "You need to understand the impact of your words, Eric. And I believe a fitting consequence is for you to experience the discomfort you caused." With a determined grace, Tina retrieved a bar of soap from the nearby sink. 

The sight of it in her hand sent a shiver down Eric's spine, a mixture of apprehension and a sinking realization of what was to come. Tina's voice was steady, her tone unwavering. "Open your mouth, Eric." 

Eric's heart raced as he complied, his lips parting to reveal the void where words had once flowed without restraint. The taste of soap met his tongue, a bitter reminder of the consequences of his actions. As the soap suds mingled with his taste buds, his gaze remained fixed on Tina, a mix of humility and regret etched across his features. Tina's eyes held a blend of sternness and compassion, her voice softening as she spoke. "This might be uncomfortable, but I want you to remember this feeling. Just as your words left a bitter taste, your actions had a lasting impact." Eric nodded, his eyes locked with Tina's, his understanding mirrored in his gaze. The taste of the bar of soap was a visceral reminder of the lesson he was learning, a lesson that extended beyond the physical discomfort. 

As the taste of soap lingered on his tongue, Eric felt a mixture of humility and gratitude. He knew that Tina's actions were a reflection of her commitment to their relationship, her determination to guide him on a path of accountability and redemption. But at the same time he felt embarrassed and ashamed. He knew his behavior last night was totally out of line and he feared that Tina might not forgive him for his hurtful words and behavior. He knew that his actions had cast a shadow over the night, his drunkenness unraveling the threads of restraint he had so carefully woven. 

As the echoes of his slurred words lingered in the air, Tina found herself standing at the crossroads of anger and concern. With a sad look on her face, Tina looked at Eric—a man she loved deeply, a man who had lost himself to the intoxicating haze. 

The emotion that swelled within her was a tumultuous blend of frustration and fear—a fear of the demons that alcohol had unleashed, a frustration at the recklessness that had wounded their sacred connection. As the minutes ticked by, Eric's vulnerability was a stark contrast to the bravado he had exuded last night. His gaze, once confident, now held a glimmer of remorse—a mirror reflecting the reality of his actions. The weight of his drunken words had left scars, and Tina knew that these scars ran deep, impacting the fabric of their bond. 

With a mixture of determination and tenderness, Tina's voice broke the silence, her words infused with a fierce sincerity. "You can take the bar of soap out of your mouth now. But Eric, I want you to understand that what happened tonight was not okay. Your words hurt, and your actions crossed a line." 

a real email exchange

A friend, a reader of my blog, wrote me a while back: 

" One of the things that I really like is the concept of act like a child...be treated like a child....that could mean, regular over the knee spankings with my legs going up and down, with my bottom bare, with my panties just below my cheeks or down at my ankles....and tears coming from my eyes....scolding over your knee when I misbehave...followed by corner time....now the other child like punishments you talk about such as early bedtime, being sent to my room, grounding, needing total permission for anything. This is such a great turn on and yes I have been thinking about all of this in the naughtiest of ways...

And here is what I replied: I think it shows clearly that I cared about him. I still do. But I have not heard from him in a long time.

"I know that there is a child in you that is longing to be seen and longing to be taken care of. This is probably what I always could feel with you. I told you many times that I care about you, without actually knowing why I do care about you sooo much. I mean: in your regular life, I am 100% sure, you don`t signal: "I want to be taken care of. I want to be loved, I want to test my boundaries. I want to know that you care about me."

It always felt interesting between you and me. 

I know that I have something that you are lacking in your life (and of course vice versa, you got a lot that I am not having).I am super in all things emotional. I met the attorney general of my state recently, during a dinner debate, and even with him did I speak about feelings. He did not want to do that, did not want to be led to unfamiliar territory, but I did not care ;-) 

Feelings and emotions are what I am best at. And I am actually strong emotionally. I am strong enough to hold you and guide you through emotional and physical pain. And the domestic discipline thing is a perfect way to make you understand: "you are important to me. I won`t let you get away with bad behavior. I will not hesitate to make you understand that even you have to follow some rules. You better get your act together or there will be some consequences that you won`t like." 

For instance: sending you to bed early (or maybe in your case: telling you to stay in bed for 2 hours longer, lol) is a perfect way to make an impression. I can already feel it in my stomach.  My stomach is a very good indicator :-) And I like that feeling. 

I can almost see you negotiating with me "but Tina, it´s important, I need to get up, I need to make that phone call, I have to do this and that.." 

I would of course never really interfere with your business. But if I wanted to teach you a lesson, I would not hesitate to give you a time out... All you had to do is accept my decision and stay in bed. And if you did not do that, if you did not surrender to me, I would just get one of your very own belts and use it on your bare bottom for a while to get my point through to you.

With me, you would cry regularly. I can sense that you don`t allow yourself these softer sides as often as you deserve. I am often wondering: where on earth are you "storing" all your emotions? You cannot show them in business, that is clear. But you need to have a place to "let go" at least once in a while.

And in a way, I´d really like to have that part in your life. I can feel that you are not giving that little boy inside you enough space. I know how hard it is to always stay in control, to always make the decisions, to be the leader and to deal with all the big problems... 

I cannot really "play" domestic discipline stuff with you at the moment. For many reasons. But I can assure you that I am here for you anyway.

With me, you will always have a safe place."

being a lawyer again

I am working as a lawyer again and so far it's great. 

The transition back into law was much easier than expected. I work with and for a team of young men, I call them "my boys". They are treating me well and I enjoy that I finally am the master of my own time again. 

I do everything remotely. The law firm is in Germany and the clients are all German too. I work from 6 am to 2 pm  or 3 pm and can spend the afternoon at the beach or meditating or meditating at the beach, lol.

I finally have time for the kink again. And I love that I have finally time to blog again too. The last one and a half years were crazy busy. I felt so constricted. I am glad that it is over. But I can also feel that I have grown as a woman.

I am not sure where my journey is going as far as the kink is concerned. My husband is not willing to do anything kinky with me and I am still pondering what I wanna do about it and if I wanna do something about it...or not.

In the last months I have pretty much ignored that I am a woman. That is something that I can do easily. In the past I used to do that for years. I just lived as a human being and the fact that I was a woman was completely irrelevant.

I was so happy when I finally had tapped into my femininity and focused on my sexual desires for a while. but now I feel like: The fact that I am not living it anymore is not as bad as it was, because for a decade or so I had a super interesting and colorful sex life, and the blog helped me a big part in having it.

At the moment I am not sure where I want to go with my sexuality. My husband is not giving me what I want, but I am nevertheless pretty happy in my vanilla relationship with him at the moment. We can spend a lot of time together now, most days we both work from home. My friends were warning me and saying: "It will be difficult when the two of you are suddenly together that much, " But it seems like we are both enjoying it. If I have to do phone calls, he is super quiet and when he is making phone calls or seeing clients at home, I am super quiet. We are working together like a fine-tuned machine. It's nice.

I have become pretty unreliable in answering my emails on my strong woman account. I apologize to all of you who have written to me and did not get a reply. I just don't know where to go, figuratively speaking. I feel at ease with getting turned on by female dominance and male submission, I am at peace with my love for spanking a man's butt. I think it is cool that so many of you are living this lifestyle. It feels like there is not much to explore anymore.

When I did the job interview for the legal job, I realized in the last minute that I am still logged in into my strong woman account. When I turned the camera on, instead of "Tina Mueller" it said "The strong woman". I laughed when I saw it. I was so relaxed, when the interview began, I just told the interviewer with a nice smile: ahhh, i am logged into the wrong account. Ignore the "strong woman", my name is "Tina Mueller". I figured: well, if by coincidence they should know about this blog and make the connection. so be it. But it was no problem, they hired me.

I do not longer counsel or coach men in any way, shape or form. I dont play with my readers anymore. In the past I did not really play either, it was always very meaningful to me when I had a D/s interaction with someone. But lately it feels like: I dont want to have a close emotional connection with anyone else but my husband. I don't want to do anything with a man who is married to another woman who is not interested in his kink. I don't feel "responsible" anymore to solve other people's relationships. I am not interested anymore in helping men to secretly living the kink.  

I have become much better in keeping boundaries and taking care of myself.

The one guy I still spank is a wonderful human being. He is intelligent and emotional smart and has a big heart. My husband knows all about it and is fine with it.