Changes

I got the following comment:

"You seem to have changed over the last three months and from what seemed to be someone with a great ideal and lots of ideas, to someone with a huge amount of passion, wisdom and love to give."

The words made me think a lot. And I realised that I did change indeed since starting my blog. The journey of finding the right guy through the internet has definitely had an impact on my whole life. I am much more self-confident now and I know for sure that I do have something to offer that many men would like to have.This alone gives me a much better standing in my private life and in business life as well.Its all about how one sees oneself in life,isn´t it? ;-)

The blog has given me an insight in the male minds like nothing else before in my life. And the really good news is, that you guys are just fantastic. I did not think that men could write so touchingly about their feelings, their fantasies and their hopes.I did receive mails, written in such an honesty and openness,... I did not expect that at all. In most cases it felt like I would owe it to the sender to at least answer with a few lines.Which I did.

And it was not alwasy easy for me. That I can say for sure. To give you and idea how hard work corresponding with you guys actually was, I can tell you, that I did send more than 1 200 e-mails from my then new opened yahoo account. And not two of these mails were written in standard phrases. I tried to address each commenter and writer personally. Sure, some of my mails were longer and better than others, but basically my intention was to respect each comment. Right now I am wondering myself how I managed to keep my law firm running during that time....

Today I sometimes feel like the younger "Aunt Kay". I am sure you know her all.The lady from "disciplinary wifes club". :-) Without even intending to, suddenly I seem to be considered an expert on the subject of femal led relationships and domestic discipline. And in a way, I actually am an expert now. Thanks to all of you who shared fantasies, real life experiences, success stories and wrong decisions with me.

A problem is right now, that I KNOW that I have a lot to give to some of you. And I really want to, because that is just part of my personality. And sometimes, just from a mail, I can FEEL exactly what the guy is missing in his life and I know that I could provide him with these things... However, that is a difficult situation for me, because my main intention is and always was, to focus on "the right man" and not so much to have many different men in my live. I am sure, you all know stories about dominant women having different sub men in different cities... I soooo could have that, no doubt about that. But that is not my cup of tea at all. Lately I have been "breaking up" with a few of my dear writers in order to get my emotional life under control again and in order to take care of my needs in the same way I do take care of the needs of a man who is dear to my heart.

And one last comment:
Spanking or kissing, corner times or teasing, hot sex, punishments or gentle touching... in the end its all about having someone in my life who really cares about me!