being a lawyer again

I am working as a lawyer again and so far it's great. 

The transition back into law was much easier than expected. I work with and for a team of young men, I call them "my boys". They are treating me well and I enjoy that I finally am the master of my own time again. 

I do everything remotely. The law firm is in Germany and the clients are all German too. I work from 6 am to 2 pm  or 3 pm and can spend the afternoon at the beach or meditating or meditating at the beach, lol.

I finally have time for the kink again. And I love that I have finally time to blog again too. The last one and a half years were crazy busy. I felt so constricted. I am glad that it is over. But I can also feel that I have grown as a woman.

I am not sure where my journey is going as far as the kink is concerned. My husband is not willing to do anything kinky with me and I am still pondering what I wanna do about it and if I wanna do something about it...or not.

In the last months I have pretty much ignored that I am a woman. That is something that I can do easily. In the past I used to do that for years. I just lived as a human being and the fact that I was a woman was completely irrelevant.

I was so happy when I finally had tapped into my femininity and focused on my sexual desires for a while. but now I feel like: The fact that I am not living it anymore is not as bad as it was, because for a decade or so I had a super interesting and colorful sex life, and the blog helped me a big part in having it.

At the moment I am not sure where I want to go with my sexuality. My husband is not giving me what I want, but I am nevertheless pretty happy in my vanilla relationship with him at the moment. We can spend a lot of time together now, most days we both work from home. My friends were warning me and saying: "It will be difficult when the two of you are suddenly together that much, " But it seems like we are both enjoying it. If I have to do phone calls, he is super quiet and when he is making phone calls or seeing clients at home, I am super quiet. We are working together like a fine-tuned machine. It's nice.

I have become pretty unreliable in answering my emails on my strong woman account. I apologize to all of you who have written to me and did not get a reply. I just don't know where to go, figuratively speaking. I feel at ease with getting turned on by female dominance and male submission, I am at peace with my love for spanking a man's butt. I think it is cool that so many of you are living this lifestyle. It feels like there is not much to explore anymore.

When I did the job interview for the legal job, I realized in the last minute that I am still logged in into my strong woman account. When I turned the camera on, instead of "Tina Mueller" it said "The strong woman". I laughed when I saw it. I was so relaxed, when the interview began, I just told the interviewer with a nice smile: ahhh, i am logged into the wrong account. Ignore the "strong woman", my name is "Tina Mueller". I figured: well, if by coincidence they should know about this blog and make the connection. so be it. But it was no problem, they hired me.

I do not longer counsel or coach men in any way, shape or form. I dont play with my readers anymore. In the past I did not really play either, it was always very meaningful to me when I had a D/s interaction with someone. But lately it feels like: I dont want to have a close emotional connection with anyone else but my husband. I don't want to do anything with a man who is married to another woman who is not interested in his kink. I don't feel "responsible" anymore to solve other people's relationships. I am not interested anymore in helping men to secretly living the kink.  

I have become much better in keeping boundaries and taking care of myself.

The one guy I still spank is a wonderful human being. He is intelligent and emotional smart and has a big heart. My husband knows all about it and is fine with it.