Tuesday, August 24, 2010

trying to stay cool :-)

I just had a very pleasant phone conversation with a lawyer colleague of mine. The good news is, that he is writing the paper for me in the judicial case I mentioned two posts ago. This is an enormous relief to me. After weeks of trying to find a  solution how to proceed in that matter...the solution is finally here. And on the last day possible! The judge wants to have the paper on the 25th of August.

With this terrible thing off of my desk, I suddenly found myself in a position with a few minutes to spare.

And I realised one thing as far as my trip to the US is concerned:

OMG, I AM SO NERVOUS...What on earth am I doing :-)

"Little Tina" alone in the States, far from home.
How will it be to meet the man in real life?
How am I supposed to behave when we meet for the first time?
What shall I say or do?
How will he react when he sees me?
Will he like me?
And will our expectations be fullfiled?

Ahhhhhhhhhhh, it `s all REAL now.

Over the last days I urgently wanted to talk with him about my feelings, because talking just calms me down.

He, on the other hand, would have needed for me to be quiet for a moment. To give him a chance to get used to the situation himself . Because he did not expect me to come so soon indeed. He actually had no clue! For some reason I made a decision to see him very soon. And I still think that was a smart decision! I only told him I would come after I did book a airplane ticket. How is that for female dominance, lol.

I think he is even more nervous than I am...I will give him the time he needs to process things. It took me a while to understand it, but I finally got it. I am a smart woman after all :-)

I am pretty sure that I will have fun with the man. Just doing regular things, like going for a walk, going to the beach, nothing spectacular. No matter if we should click or not in the kinky area. So in my opinion there is nothing for him to worry about. The thing is, he is putting himself under a lot of pressure. Pressure homemade by him :-)

So now I am sitting here, with nobody to talk to but you.

My german friends, who know that I fly to the US, do of course not know the "unusual" situation that stands behind my trip. I do not tell my VERY vanilla friends: "I opened an internet blog on domestic discipline, made contact with a man and am now flying thousands of miles in order to see him..."

Not even I would do that, even though I tend to not hide anything :-)
My life is an open book to the people around me. Sometimes my friends can not believe the things I am discussing with other people. Even my very fundamentalistic christian pastor, who is a very good friend, knows the whole story (but not the kinky/dd elements) about my journey of finding a good man. He is at loss of words, has no idea how to deal with the situation of me flying alone to the US, only to see a man...a man I have never met before...But he is wishing me the best :-)

Anyway, send me a word of support, will you?


  1. Watliab sagt. Viel Glück auf Deiner Ungewöhnlichen Reise wünsche ich Dir von ganzem Herzen, hoffentlich findest Du das was Du dir am sehnlichsten Wünschst

  2. Hi TIna,

    Have you been to the states previously? Pretty big place. Lots of interesting things to see and do.

    It's been many years since I travelled outside the US. Loved Germany, and the Bavarians. Funny, they all told me not to go to Prussia, because the folks there were not friendly. Some of the eastern US is like that.

    In any case: Viel Gluck in die Vereinigten Staaten!


  3. Hi Tina:

    Good luck in your trip to the US!

    If you are near me when you come here, let me know. I'd love to see you.

    Drop me a line, one way or the other.


  4. Hello Tina,

    Good luck with your trip to the US. I hope you'll have a good time, and that the man you're going to meet turns out to at least be a good friend to you, and perhaps more.

    I've heard an expression, "fate favors the fearless."

    Have fun!


  5. Be open, be yourself. Let him be the same. Everything will turn out well.

  6. One thing I have learned from travelling and living in other countries - incuding the USA - is that no matter how big the world seems, we can only occupy a small bit of it at any one time. And that keeps it, and our experience, in perspective and managable.

    The trick to success is to look to have fun.

  7. Tina, I'm sure you are both nervous, and both hoping it will work out well. Just be yourself, direct and honest, and get to know this man. If you are right for one another,that will become evident pretty soon. One bit of advice: tell your friends, pastor, etc. somewhat less about what you are doing. XO

  8. Thanks everybody. I am actually in the US now, with him.Everything worked out well, I am having a very good time so far.
    He is scared of me writing to all of you about the size of his..., lol, but I would never do such a thing :-)

  9. How did I miss this post? I would have certainly offered you support! ;) Oh and.....don't believe what you hear about the "eastern" US....we are extremely friendly people :)