Friday, December 10, 2010

a woman in love

I am back in Germany.It is very strange to be here again. My time in the USA has just been extremely nice.

I am not afraid to share it with all of you: I LOVE the man.

There are many obstacles and difficulties in his and in my life and it is hard to tell when exactly we will see each other again. But I will see him again. That' s for sure. Being with him feels so right. He is the man I have been waiting for in the past. Just recently, during an argument..., I told him that I trust him with my life. And that was not cheap talk.I can feel that there is an extraordinary strong bond of affection between us.

The only 'problem' is: he is such a private person. Which means I can not share too much with you about him and me...I just like to talk to people about private things. And for some reason people keep telling me very private things. We went to church a couple of days ago. And he said to me. 'Do you think the female pastor is pregnant?'  And I only answered: 'Do you want me to ask her if she is?'  I would have loved to talk with her about whether she is pregnant or not. And I am sure she would have told me EVERYTHING about it, lol.

But I know he 'hates' it when I am doing that as far as he and his life is concerned. Therefore I won't do that.

What I can share however is: My dominant career is an 'epic fail', lol.
There is no strong woman anymore ;-) I became a very well-behaved  woman, lol.(To be honest, I am not sure if he would agree with that statement. I think even a very good "Tina" is still a lot to bear for any man. But that is his problem, he can not expect me to feel sorry for him in that regard!!!!)

Me...I am melting like butter in his hands.
I ended up giving him massages for hours. I suddenly felt very close with all you submissive guys out there. I now understand the beauty of giving someone an endless foot massage.

HE even threatened to spank me.(Even though it was just a threat, no actions were taken...) Can you believe that? I almost can not believe it myself! And the even more unbelievable thing is: I did not mind him telling me that.

I think it is all linked to the fact that I have not been trying to find a submissive man in the first place. My main goal was to find the right partner for me. And him and I, we were able to establish a really sound and deep relationship through all the hundreds of emails we have been exchanging in the past.I know he would not do me any harm. And I have no intention of harming him.

He gives me a feeling of secureness and belonging which I have not had before in my life. It is a very unfamiliar feeling, but a very good one!

6 comments:

  1. Tina,
    So glad you had a good time in the U.S. with your friend, and that you are in love. I wouldn't worry about the F/M thing. That is the beauty of loving relationships, they evolve, slowly, to where they need to be.

    Regards,
    Throck

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  2. Great to hear that you are love. Life doesn't get much better than to love and be loved. Good luck on your journey.

    FD

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  3. Tina,
    This self-revelation is wonderful! Of course, you are free to have the relationship that you all want, but wouldn't it be something if you all decided to "give and take" as far as "discipline" is concerned. Of course, you should "major" on the concerns of love, respect, and communication--things that you have mentioned before on former posts.

    Congratulations, Bob.

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  4. Hi,
    This is good news. i am sure you will get to a good understanding of the relationship as it progresses. i would certainly not let him put his hand on you. i think you still must know that is your role.
    All the best with it.
    lw

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